Finding Blessings In Disguise

I Shall Never Forget

2011-09-11T20:51:00.000-07:00

Ten years ago I was driving to work when the news of the first plane hitting the World Trade center broke on the radio. As I looked to my left, I caught a glimpse of a huge American flag blowing in the breeze up against a bright blue, cloudless sky. The timing of that moment of where I was when I heard the news has always given me chills.

The feelings of learning that the attacks were orchestrated by men who wanted to destroy Americans and everything about us because they deem us to be "infidels" were so foreign to me. As a member of Generation X, I vividly recall what it was like living in fear of the Soviet Union and mutually assured nuclear destruction. We knew who our enemy was - the Russians. How do you identify your enemy when their declaration of war is based on a religious belief from an offshoot of the world's largest religion and spans throughout every country in the world? This event launched an unprecedented situation where the world's largest superpower waged war on a group of people - a faction of a religion, rather than a nation. While the US did not wage a war on the religion of Islam, the targets are all Islamic and they want me dead because I'm not. They sought to kill us, destroy us, and shake our faith.

Fast-forward ten years and I'm a mom to two amazing children. On a beautiful Sunday morning with a sky and the weather so eerily like that of Tuesday, September 11, 2001, my oldest child received her Bible from our church. As I remember the loss, the fear, and everything else that is a part of the story of 9/11, I celebrate my child taking a huge step in her walk with Christianity. While we lost so much and so many on 9/11, the enemy did not succeed. They seriously underestimated the fortitude of the American people. If being a God-fearing American makes me an infidel, I shall wear that label with pride and I will teach my children to do the same.

Tonight I pray for God to protect our troops still in harm's way as they continue seek to stop the terrorists. I pray for the families of those who were killed on 9/11. I give thanks for those on-board Flight 93 who sacrificed themselves to save countless more. I give thanks and pray for first-responders everywhere. They are a special group of people who were often unsung heroes until 9/11 thrust them into the spotlight. I pray for our nation's leaders that they might do the right thing as we continue this war on terror. I pray for the hearts of those who choose hate to be softened and that God's love may find it's way to their souls. I pray that I can follow the words of my pastor this morning and find forgiveness. I pray that no nation ever sees another day like 9/11. I give thanks for the children who received their Bibles this morning on this anniversary of something so tragic.

May God bless America and may we never forget, for those who do not learn from history are doomed to repeat it. Once was one time too many.

Praying, Pride, and Giving Thanks

2011-08-23T11:22:00.000-07:00

As I type this post, a sorority sister of mine is in an operating room having a two-inch tumor removed from her colon. I am praying that the Lord blesses her surgical team with steady and sure eyes and hands and that they can remove all of the cancer from her body. I pray that she makes it through with no complications and that they can cure her of this horrible disease. I pray for her husband as he stays strong for her and their three children. I pray that God holds those babies close and takes away any fear that they may have over their mommy being sick.

Last night I had this friend's CaringBridge page opened and noticed that I had another friend's CaringBridge page open as well. When I think of all of the friends and family who have a CaringBridge site for one illness or another, I feel overwhelmed with grief for their suffering. I also feel humbled to be so fortunate to have everyone in my household be in such good health. I also feel humbled by the opportunity to intercede for them and lift them up in prayer. We are such stubborn creatures and want to prove to everyone that we can take care of ourselves and our own. Our society has taught us that it is a weakness to ask for help and our prideful nature holds us to that misconception.

Today I am thankful that my friend's doctors found this tumor early and that it has not spread. I am thankful that she lives in an area with amazing healthcare facilities. I am thankful for the opportunity to lift her up in prayer. I am thankful to live in a country where I am free to exercise my faith openly and without the fear of persecution. I am thankful for the amazing example of faith that my friend is setting for those who know her as she endures this major pothole on her path. I am thankful for the wonderful Bible study that I am a part of in my church and the study that we are doing on attitudes. I am thankful for my health, my family, and the fact that each and every day is a gift from God.

Hard-Headed Children

2011-08-20T21:17:00.000-07:00

I got to spend my Saturday night with a kiddo in the local ER after she hit her head in the shower. Once I got my husband upstairs to help with her bloody nose, I did a quick Google search to find out what it meant when someone had a nosebleed after hitting their head (not their nose). Site after site advised to seek medical attention for a possible skull fracture. So, I slip into scary-calm, mommy mode and load her up into the car with her security blanket and favorite toy for a trip to the ER.

We arrived to a nearly-empty waiting room and were back in a room within 25 minutes of arrival. They quickly assessed her and ordered a CT - head, face, and c-spine to rule out concussion, fracture, and any other potential damage. Thankfully, everything came back just fine and we just have a really big goose egg on the forehead.

Before going back for the CT, the nurse advised us of the scan producing large amounts of radiation and the risks associated with it. This is actually my child's second head CT in her short life. She fell off of a 3-feet high retaining wall and hit her head on concrete three years ago. While I'm not crazy about the risk of the radiation, the risk of her slipping into an unconscious state and never waking outweighs the risk of the scan infinitely. It's not a chance I'm willing to take.

Tonight I am giving thanks to God for keeping my baby safe and praying that the radiation exposure from the scan will have no long-term effects on her. I am thankful to live in a community with such a great local hospital. I am thankful for insurance. I am thankful for my child's (apparently) extremely hard head. :-)

Just Say No (To Your Kids)

2011-08-11T21:06:00.000-07:00

I saw a news story out of Memphis tonight about a student who set out to kill his principal because she didn't put him in a class that he wanted. Police reports say that the boy planned out the murder all during summer break. Out of curiosity, I Googled the most dangerous jobs in America and looked through the Forbes list of the top 10. It came as no surprise that nowhere in the list were educators or school administrators included, but is this instance just the tip of the iceberg for a trend of a generation raised by over-indulgent parents? In a society where kids are rewarded with trophies for simply being on a team, everyone afraid to ever hurt someone's self-esteem or offend someone by being politically incorrect, what else do we have to look forward to in the news?

While I don't have any factual basis for my opinions, this kid's behavior just screams of being overly indulged. I can't help but think that this kid was a product of this generation and things might not have turned out so sadly if his parents had told him "no" a little more often in his life.

So, where do I find the blessing in all of this? It's certainly not in the death of the school administrator. It's certainly not in the fact that there will be another prisoner/violent offender that will be sucking up my tax dollars. I feel that the blessing is that it reminds me that I have an obligation to not indulge my children's every whim even if it breaks my heart or theirs to do it. They need to know how to handle rejection, failure, and disappointment in life. I would be failing them and society if I do not tell them "no" every now and then, because someone will inevitably say it to them at some point and they need to be ready for it.

Happy Anniversary!

2011-08-09T21:14:00.000-07:00

Today marks 14 years of wedded bliss with my husband. We were set up on a blind date by some meddlesome friends at the beginning of the spring semester almost 20 years ago. In true grown-up fashion, we celebrated the evening with the annual "Meet the Teacher" night at our kids' school. He dozed off on the couch and I caught up on my shows in the DVR while he snored next to me.

While it may not be the most romantic way to spend the day that marks our union as husband and wife, we did it as a family and that's all that really counts in my book.

Fire Drills

2011-08-08T21:23:00.000-07:00

Today my youngest kiddo got herself all worked up over the fear of our house catching fire. We went through this a couple of years ago with the oldest one, but it wasn't like this. Kiddo ended up packing all of the favored stuffed animals into a backpack and wore it around the house to keep everything with her in case she had to make an escape. There was a lot of convincing to tell her that she couldn't sleep with it on. So...the backpack is sitting next to the bed tonight in case of an emergency.

I remember being afraid of things like that when I was a kid. I was so afraid that something would happen to me and that I wouldn't be there to play with my toys and they would be sad. I can remember many sleepless nights worrying about such things.

It breaks my heart to see my baby carrying so much anxiety and fear over something that she can't control. I tell her to give it over to God, but she still seems absolutely gripped by her fear. I pray that this will just be another phase in the drama-filled world of raising kids and that it will soon pass.

In the meanwhile, I give thanks for my healthy children who are generally very happy when not worrying about things they can't control.

Mean

2011-08-06T19:31:00.000-07:00

Today my oldest learned the cruel reality of how grown-ups can be mean bullies to children they don't even know. While playing at a local place frequently used for kids' birthday parties, my daughter was involved in a near-miss with another child while playing. The mom of the other child walked up and screamed at my kid, causing her to nearly have an anxiety attack because she couldn't understand why the adult was so mean to her. Rather than simply explaining to my daughter in a calm, parental tone that she needed to be more careful, she verbally assaulted a child that she didn't even know. If it weren't for another friend of mine witnessing this, I would have simply thought that my child had exaggerated the adult's behavior. My friend was appalled to learn that the woman who gave my child the verbal tongue-lashing was not someone related to her as she had assumed when she witnessed this event.

I am trying to find the blessing in this and I suppose that it's that my husband didn't have to post bail for me this evening, as I never had a chance to confront my child's overgrown bully.

After telling my daughter that no one has the right to yell at her like that, I simply told her that the lady is just mean...

You, with your words like knives

And swords and weapons that you use against me

You have knocked me off my feet again

Got me feeling like a nothing

You, with your voice like nails on a chalkboard

Calling me out when I'm wounded

You picking on the weaker man

~ Taylor Swift, "Mean"

Help Tennessee Flood Victims!

2010-05-05T22:11:00.000-07:00

Fifteen inches of rain falling into several major watersheds in two short days has led to historic, widespread flooding for much of Middle and West Tennessee. Tens of thousands of homeowners ended up with their homes partially or completely underwater and they have no flood insurance because their neighborhoods were not in FEMA's flood zones and insurance was not available to them. Historic tourist venues such as Opryland Hotel and the Grand Ole Opry are flooded. Many people lost their lives and the death toll is expected to rise as the waters continue to recede back into the Cumberland River. The cost of this disaster will reach into the billions before it is all said and done and the national media has largely ignored the story of what has happened here.

Citizens of the Volunteer State have stepped up in so many ways that the national media should put the spotlight on us. There have been countless reports of neighbor helping neighbor, stranger helping stranger, and the government officials have handled the situation with professional poise that should be a shining example for leaders at all levels of government to see. I am proud of my fellow Tennesseans as there have been no reports of looting or rioting. The cynical side of me thinks that perhaps if there had been, the national media would have found our story more newsworthy.

Regardless of the amount of time dedicated to our plight here in Tennessee on the nightly news, our friends, families, and neighbors need your help and that help will require money. I beg anyone reading this to visit www.nashvilleredcross.org to help the flood victims in Middle Tennessee get back on their feet or text REDCROSS to 90999 to make a $10 donation on your mobile phone.

If you have not seen the footage from the Nashville area, check out the video below to get a taste of what happened to the Athens of the South and its surrounding area.

Help Our Neighbors!

2010-05-03T21:06:00.000-07:00

It's been a while since I've posted and this is certainly something worthy to write about. I came home from a conference along the Alabama coast where they were awaiting the oil slick to come ashore to find my hometown and the area around us flooded. I laughed along the drive home as I considered the fact that I was traveling along a hurricane evacuation route on my way to a flood zone.

Nashville, Franklin, Clarksville, and so many other towns in Middle and West Tennessee have suffered a devastating flood that no one could have predicted. Nearly 15 inches of rain fell on the area in two short days, filling rivers and creeks beyond their capacity. States of emergency have been declared in many counties and we have been ordered to use water only for drinking, cooking, and bathing. There are homes completely submerged in areas not classified by FEMA as flood zones and the homeowners do not have flood insurance. The Cumberland River is out of its banks and is flooding LP Field and many tourist destinations near the riverfront area in Downtown Nashville. Opryland Hotel, Opry Mills Mall, and the Grand Ole Opry House are flooded. Sadly, several people have lost their lives and they expect the death toll to rise after the waters recede and they find people who did not evacuate.

My family was very blessed to avoid the flooding at our home. There's plenty of it close to our neighborhood, but we were among the fortunate. This area needs your prayers and the Red Cross needs your money. Please give from the heart to help because so many of the victims will have to rely on Federal disaster funds in the aftermath of all of this.

Only the Good Die Young?

2010-02-04T20:35:00.000-08:00

Tonight I lost a friend that I've had since elementary school. I have so many conflicting emotions right now. I'm mad and I'm sad and I'm devastated and my heart absolutely aches for the two little girls who have been left behind. I've walked that path and I know the heartache of your daddy missing all of the big moments in your life - prom, graduation, going to college, getting married, having children. I wouldn't wish that fate on my worst enemy. My friend was only forty years old. He served our country as a young Marine and then re-enlisted in the Guard after 9/11. He did not die in combat, but he wasn't afraid to do so. I give thanks for him, his spirit, and others like him. Because of men and women like him, I am free to write whatever the hell I want out in here in cyberspace or just about any other place where I feel so inclined. Tonight I'll have a beer, listen to some classic Zeppelin, and remember the good times that I shared with my friend. I pray that his soul finds the peace that it struggled to find here. I don't think that Billy Joel was completely right because plenty of other "good" live to a ripe old age and we still miss the hell out of them.

Sometimes Life Really Sucks

2010-02-03T19:55:00.000-08:00

Tonight I am lifting up prayers, praying for a miracle for a childhood friend who is on life support. The circumstances surrounding it point to his history of self-destructive behavior, but that doesn't diminish the reality or severity of the situation. Tonight his wife and his mother are holding vigil and will be making decisions with doctors tomorrow after a repeat brain scan. I want to yell at him and kick his ass for doing something stupid, but instead I pray. I pray that God will grace his family with a miracle and he will wake up from this nightmare. I pray that two little girls will not have to face their futures without their daddy. I pray that God will hold his wife and his family through all of this and give them peace and strength to make difficult decisions if a miracle doesn't happen. I give thanks to God for my family, my husband, and my children. I give thanks for the sound of my husband snoring down the hall. I listen to the music that we listened to together 20 years ago and remember good times...and bad ones...and pray that there will be more memories to be made in his future.

A Mother's Musing On Snow Days...

2010-02-01T17:25:00.000-08:00

Snow in the South is always a big deal - especially for young children who have only seen it a handful of times in their short, precious lives. I'll admit it - it's a big deal for me, too. The snow fell on Friday and school was preemptively canceled so that kids didn't end up stranded on buses as they tried to get the children home. The temps stayed below freezing all weekend, so the backroads were still a mess today and my kids got another day of freedom. Don't get me wrong, I love my children but there is only so much that a parent can take when the roads are a mess and there's no escape from the cabin-fever induced ravings of small children. Tomorrow my oldest goes back to school and I give thanks to the snow-melting God in Heaven for that little gift of peace and quiet.

Why Did I Teach My Kids How To Talk?

2010-01-27T16:57:00.000-08:00

Ugh! Maybe it's because it's winter and my kids are trapped inside because we Southerners are sissies when it comes to the cold or maybe I'm turning into a harpie, but I have found myself asking the question, "Why on Earth did I teach my kids to talk?!" I have honestly lost count of how many times I've asked them to be quiet or to stop talking ugly to one another (or to me) today alone. Don't get me wrong, I love my kids and I love the sounds of them playing and laughing, but I have reached my saturation point with the backtalk and sassiness. On the bright side (currently inspired by The Killers' "Mr Brightside"), I have a wonderful husband who picks up when I need to flake out and hide. So, here I sit, in my office with the door closed listening to The Killers, eating my salad from Chick-Fil-A and trying to regroup. I'm going to need it...snow and ice are in the forecast for tomorrow!

It's Just a Little Apnea...

2010-01-25T19:46:00.000-08:00

Today I learned that one of my children has sleep apnea and that she needs to have her tonsils and adenoids taken out. The thought of putting my child through any kind of surgery is unsettling and frightening but I know that it has to be done. I know that we will be scared, but this is a one-time thing and then we're done with it. It's an outpatient procedure with a few days of recovery at home. Each day I open my email and have the reminders of parents who are in a constant state of fear and worry as they deal with watching their children fight leukemia. That is a battle that takes several years and then there is the nagging fear of relapse. I read their CaringBridge updates and my heart breaks into a million little pieces for them all over again. Tonight I give thanks for my healthy children. Yes, we have to have surgery, but that is nothing compared to the hell that these sweet little children go through to fight the monster of childhood cancer.

Super Bowl 2010

2010-01-24T20:48:00.000-08:00

Wow! I can't believe that I actually give a crap about this year's Super Bowl. When the Titans blew their playoff chances on Christmas Day, I pretty much quit paying attention. Now my favorite UT quarterback is playing against the team that his father played for and the team that he grew up around. What a great human interest angle!! I don't particularly care who wins, but I would love for Peyton to get another Super Bowl ring so I suppose that I'll be pulling for the Colts on Super Bowl Sunday. With the year that the Saints have had and all of the excitement that they've stirred up, it should be good game with a very exciting atmosphere. Laissez le bon temps roulez!

Slack Much?

2010-01-23T22:06:00.000-08:00

I just spent the better part of an hour or so uploading the rest of the pictures from Christmas and then wondered when the last time I ordered prints actually was. I checked my order history and saw that it was back in August. Ugh! So...234 pictures later, I'll be able to update my photo albums with the pictures of my kiddos. Although that order doesn't include any of the Christmas pictures. I still need to pick and choose from the 200 or so pictures sitting out there. While I love the ability to tweak and delete photos, it is easy to be overwhelmed by the sheer volume of pictures that are taken and simply forget to get them printed. There are some times when I miss the old days of dropping off a roll of film just to see what I ended up with on the prints. It was much easier to not lose anything in the shuffle.

Oh, well...I'll get caught up soon and then I can worry about where I'm going to store all of these albums!

Conan Rocks!

2010-01-23T17:50:00.000-08:00

Watching the way that Conan O'Brien closed out his short run as the host of The Tonight Show, I couldn't help but be impressed with what a class act the guy is. He moved his family, his crew, and their families across the country only to get burned by a network whose ratings are plummeting across the board and they think that giving Jay Leno his old spot will fix things. Yes, he's getting enough money to run a small country for several years but he is also going to use his payout to pay severance packages to his people. His words about detesting cynicism and the rewards that hard work can bring were a great message for closing out his show. Some people would have taken the opportunity to take some bitter, cheap shots and he took the high road. The closing bit with Will Ferrell doing "Free Bird" with the cowbell will go down in television history and I will never forget that. It rocked!

I wish Conan the best in whatever he ends up doing seven months from now and I'm pretty sure that I'll be watching him wherever he is.

I Am Incredibly Humbled

2010-01-22T22:10:00.000-08:00

As I watched the "Hope for Haiti" telethon tonight and heard about the stories of tragedy and survival against the most heinous of odds, I am deeply humbled. I live in a nation of freedom, immense wealth, and extreme generosity. While I have a tendency to be cynical about celebrities and their public displays, tonight was not a night of self-congratulatory indulgence among the A-listers headlining the telethon. It was bringing the world together to save a tiny little nation sitting in the middle of the sea and the people who call that island home. In the midst of what has become known as the award season in Hollywood, rather than taking the swag and collecting statues, they sounded a siren for the world to hear how badly the people of Haiti desperately need each and every able-bodied person to give whatever they can afford to give. Whether you give $1 or $1,000, every penny counts and makes a difference.

How you can help:
www.hopeforhaitinow.org
www.redcross.org

Text "Haiti" to 90999 and $10 will be added to your cell phone bill with proceeds going to the American Red Cross Haiti Relief and Development Fund

My First Post!

2010-01-22T16:05:00.000-08:00

So...here is my first blog post. My intent for the blog is to share my random thoughts and rants and to find the blessings hidden somewhere in the message. Some days I may go off about the biatch who cut me off in traffic or some idiot politician or celebrity. I may share information about great bargains that I've found or my thoughts on a book that I recently read. As I stated in my "About Me" posting, there is always someone else who has it worse than I do and I need to try to always remember that.

In less than an hour, the "Hope for Haiti" telethon will air on all of the major networks. I encourage you to give whatever you are able to give to aid and comfort the hundreds of thousands of people who desperately need help. There are many, many charities working diligently to help put a cork in the suffering that these people are forced to endure. Choose one that fits with your own moral compass and give whatever you are able. Even if you only have $5 to give, that's $5 more than they have and it could mean life or death for someone who desperately needs our help.

Thank you for reading!